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What we carry : a memoir

by Lang, Maya,

Format: Print Book 2020
Availability: On Order 2 copies
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On Order (2)
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"Profoundly moving"-Will Schwalbe, author of The End of Your Life Book Club

"Agorgeous memoir about mothers, daughters, and the tenacity of the lovethat grows between what is said and what is left unspoken."-Mira Jacob, author of Good Talk

In caring for her aging mother and her own young daughter, writer Maya Shanbhag Lang-"a new voice of the highest caliber" (Rebecca Makkai)-confronts the legacy of family myths and how the stories shared between parents and children reverberate through generations- a deeply moving memoir about immigrants and their native-born children, the complicated love between mothers and daughters, and the discovery of strength.

How much can you judge another woman's choices? What if that woman is your mother?

Maya Shanbhag Lang grew up idolizing her brilliant mother, an accomplished physician who immigrated to the United States from India and completed her residency, all while raising her children and keeping a traditional Indian home. She had always been a source of support-until Maya became a mother herself. Then, the parent who had once been so capable and attentive turned unavailable and distant. Struggling to understand this abrupt change while raising her own young child, Maya searches for answers and soon learns that her mother is living with Alzheimer's

WhenMayasteps in to care for her, shecomes to realize that despite their closeness, she never really knew her mother.Were her cherished stories-about life in India, about what it means to be an immigrant, about motherhood itself-even true? Affecting, raw, and poetic, What We Carry is the story of a daughter and her mother, of lies and truths, of receiving and giving care-and how we cannot grow up until we fully understand the people who raised us.
Published Reviews
Publisher's Weekly Review: "Lang (The Sixteenth of June) delivers a stirring memoir exploring the fraught relationships between mothers and daughters. Born to Indian immigrants, Lang grew up in New York City in the 1980s and '90s with a stern physician mother and a father who accused her of exaggerating injuries for attention. After her parents divorced, Lang had little contact with her father and lived with her sometimes-distant, fiercely independent mother. After the author's daughter Zoe was born, Lang suffered from a crippling postpartum depression; she asked her mother for help, but her mother refused: "My body cannot handle travel anymore.... If I tried to come to you right now I would die on the plane. And would that make you feel any better? No." Years later, when Lang's daughter was in grade school, her mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease--and it was Lang who stepped in to take care of the mother who had refused to care for her. Lang details the difficulties of parental caregiving--making sure her mother eats, dealing with her intense mood swings and memory loss--and examines her own complex emotions as her mother undergoes treatment ("When she was thorny and awful, I was sympathetic. Now that she's thriving, I feel hostile"). Lang's astutely written and intense memoir will strike a chord with readers dealing with a parent's dementia. (Apr.)"
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Additional Information
Subjects Lang, Maya.
Lang, Maya -- Family.
Women authors, American -- Biography.
East Indian American women -- Biography.
Mothers and daughters -- United States -- Biography.
East Indian American women.
Mothers and daughters.
Women authors, American.
United States.
Publisher New York :2020
Edition First edition.
Language English
Description pages cm
ISBN 9780525512394
Other Classic View