And then they stopped talking to me : making sense of middle school

by Warner, Judith, 1965-

Format: Print Book 2020
Availability: Available at 13 Libraries 13 of 16 copies
Available (13)
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Brentwood Library New Non Fiction FAMILY & REL Life Stages School Age
Location  Brentwood Library
Collection  New Non Fiction
Call Number  FAMILY & REL Life Stages School Age
CLP - East Liberty New Books HQ799.15.W37 2020
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Collection  New Books
Call Number  HQ799.15.W37 2020
CLP - Lawrenceville Non-Fiction Collection HQ799.15.W37 2020
Location  CLP - Lawrenceville
Collection  Non-Fiction Collection
Call Number  HQ799.15.W37 2020
CLP - Main Library First Floor - New Non-fiction HQ799.15.W37 2020
Location  CLP - Main Library
Collection  First Floor - New Non-fiction
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CLP - Squirrel Hill Non-Fiction Collection HQ799.15.W37 2020
Location  CLP - Squirrel Hill
Collection  Non-Fiction Collection
Call Number  HQ799.15.W37 2020
Carnegie Library of Homestead New Non-Fiction 306.874 Warn
Location  Carnegie Library of Homestead
Collection  New Non-Fiction
Call Number  306.874 Warn
Mt. Lebanon Public Library Non-Fiction 306.874 War
Location  Mt. Lebanon Public Library
Collection  Non-Fiction
Call Number  306.874 War
Northland Public Library Nonfiction 306.874 W24
Location  Northland Public Library
Collection  Nonfiction
Call Number  306.874 W24
Sewickley Public Library New Book 306.874 WAR 2020
Location  Sewickley Public Library
Collection  New Book
Call Number  306.874 WAR 2020
Shaler North Hills Library Non-Fiction NEW 306.87 W
Location  Shaler North Hills Library
Collection  Non-Fiction
Call Number  NEW 306.87 W
South Park Library Parent Teacher Collection PT 306.874 WAR
Location  South Park Library
Collection  Parent Teacher Collection
Call Number  PT 306.874 WAR
Upper St. Clair Township Library New Book Shelves - Non-fiction 649.125 WAR
Location  Upper St. Clair Township Library
Collection  New Book Shelves - Non-fiction
Call Number  649.125 WAR
Whitehall Public Library New Book Collection NF 306.874 W245
Location  Whitehall Public Library
Collection  New Book Collection
Call Number  NF 306.874 W245
Unavailable (3)
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Baldwin Borough Library Parenting CHECKED OUT
Location  Baldwin Borough Library
Collection  Parenting
Northern Tier Regional Library New Book CHECKED OUT
Location  Northern Tier Regional Library
Collection  New Book
Pleasant Hills Public Library Nonfiction CHECKED OUT
Location  Pleasant Hills Public Library
Collection  Nonfiction
The French have a name for the uniquely hellish years between elementary school and high school- l' ge ingrat, or "the ugly age." Characterized by a perfect storm of developmental changes-physical, psychological, and social-the middle school years are a time of great distress for children and parents alike, marked by hurt, isolation, exclusion, competition, anxiety, and often outright cruelty. Some of this is inevitable; there are intrinsic challenges to early adolescence. But these years are harder than they need to be, and Judith Warner believes that adults are complicit.

With deep insight and compassion, Warner walks us through a new understanding of the role that middle school plays in all our lives. She argues that today's helicopter parents are overly concerned with status and achievement-in some ways a residual effect of their own middle school experiences-and that this worsens the self-consciousness, self-absorption, and social "sorting" so typical of early adolescence.

Tracing a century of research on middle childhood and bringing together the voices of social scientists, psychologists, educators, and parents, Warner's book shows how adults can be moral role models for children, making them more empathetic, caring, and resilient. She encourages us to start treating middle schoolers as the complex people they are, holding them to high standards of kindness, and helping them see one another as more than "jocks and mean girls, nerds and sluts."

Part cultural critique and part call to action, this essential book unpacks one of life's most formative periods and shows how we can help our children not only survive it but thrive.
Published Reviews
Booklist Review: "Considering the painful memories and lingering PTSD cited by some of the 125 individuals interviewed for this book, it's a wonder anyone has ever survived middle school. How have we come to this? Warner (Perfect Madness, 2005) offers several explanations. Precocious physical and social maturation, adolescents staying in school longer (instead of going to work or away to boarding school), and psychological pressure to be popular have all taken their toll. Warner's subjects' memories of bad behavior include bullying, shunning, shaming, and physical assault by former best friends, mean girls, cool kids, and sometimes even parent-to-parent. As Warner digs deeper, it becomes apparent that these hurtful episodes and feelings of exclusion are probably universal, and represent understandable reactions to seesawing emotions and hormonal swings. Her advice? Parents must keep channels of communication open, and model socially acceptable behavior, even in the face of wildly unpredictable and immature actions (whether from their own kids or other adults). This readable, relatable, and well-documented account makes sense, and should help families survive the middle school years."
From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Additional Information
Subjects Parent and teenager.
Middle school students.
Home and school.
Publisher New York :2020
Edition First edition.
Language English
Description xxiv, 287 pages ; 25 cm
Bibliography Notes Includes bibliographical references (pages 201-274) and index.
ISBN 9781101905883
Other Classic View